Modern man: 5 tips on how to manage your sexual anxieties www.london-andrology.co.uk
Are you experiencing symptoms of over stimulation? Do you find you are unable to last long enough to satisfy your partner? Have you found yourself unable to sustain or achieve an erection? Feeling anxious about your penis size or more?
Doctors at International Andrology- the leading clinic for men’s sexual and reproductive health believe that more people than ever are suffering from sexual anxiety. Here they advise on managing the issues.
“Imagine this, no TV, no Internet, no mobile phones. Now imagine how often you’d see images of a naked women… or man? Perhaps in a magazine, perhaps on page 3 of a nationwide newspaper, perhaps in a stashed away racy magazine.”
How times have changed: TV is evolving, not only is there on-demand porn, there’s now ‘soft porn’ made mainstream – have you seen Love Island lately? Late night Big Brother? How about Game of Thrones? …and if you specifically want to find something to ‘get you in the mood’, there’s the internet, there’s mobile internet, there’s downloadables… we all have on demand access to scenes-of-a-graphic-nature like never before…
…and you’re never far away. Whether you’re actively seeking them out or whether you’re passively watching late night TV.
Modern exposure to graphic images is unprecedented and it’s leading to prevalent body dimorphism (exaggerated dissatisfaction with how you look).
Have you been affected? Have you caught yourself comparing your size to an airbrushed, photo-shopped, one in a billion male model who could make women orgasm with just one look? Have your expectations changed? Would you be able to tell the difference between a man with surgical enhancements, a freak of nature super-endowed porn star and a regular guy? Or more to the point which would you find natural, normal?
Over- exposure to porn is a new-age concept and a clinically evolving condition built from media focus on an unrealistic body image. Do you obsess about your manhood? Do you find it hard to climax? Have you suffered erectile dysfunction? Experienced premature ejaculation? Are your sexual anxieties at an all-time high?
These are all indictors of over-exposure to unfeasibly impressive sexual role models.
Fun at first, relationship breaking ultimately.
So, how can you reverse long term sexual anxieties caused by porn? How do you find a happy balance? How do you combat erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, relationship troubles and unrealistic expectations?
1. Put Penis Size into Perspective
Comparison is the thief of all joy. There will always be someone bigger, better and more experienced than you. There will always be someone smaller, inferior and less experienced than you. But there will never be someone exactly like you.
Porn features shockingly large penises, shot from extremely flattering camera angles. But did you know the average length of an erect penis sits at a proud 5.1 inches? If this statistic sounds small to you, you’re likely suffering the body dysmorphic effects of porn.
Put a stop to porn comparison. It’s not what you have but how you use it.
2. Accept Porn Is Not Real Life
Films are not reality. Reality TV is not real. Turn the camera on and people behave differently, there are producers, cameras, casting directors and the person who gets an arm workout holding the extendable mic. Most importantly, there are actors.
Whether you’re watching porn or Love Island what you see is a groomed perfection, through camera filters, heavy editing, airbrushing and make up. A raunchy sound track fuels the illusion, complemented by some passionate acting…
Porn and reality TV are not real life… but watch them too often and your brain will begin to think otherwise.
3. Readjust Your Sexual Expectations… Be Realistic
Women always orgasm in porn films but new studies show realistic and scientific analysis of PornHub’s top 50, result in just an 18% orgasm rate. Meaning if you mimic porn, you’re likely to help your partner reach orgasm just 18% of the time. The majority of porn is scripted and directed to titillate male orgasm, not to represent a healthy and happy sex life.
Porn often relies on male fantasy, threesomes, completely shaven pubic areas and girl on girl acts. Foreplay is a foreign concept with pornography’s sole aim being to stimulate and to do it quickly.
Instead of aiming to replicate pornography inside your own relationship, take time to learn and enjoy what fits for you as a couple.
4. Abstain, Try It, Repeat It… and Enjoy It
Did you ever eat so many pieces of pizza you thought you’d never want to see another again? Drunk so much wine, the slight scent of another glass made you relive the morning after? Take anything in excess and it quickly becomes less satisfying, less appealing and less enjoyable. If it’s always at your fingertips, why would you want it in the first place, it’s a classic lesson in supply and demand.
The teachers of tantric sex know this. It’s an age-old concept that understands the pleasure of anticipation and the necessity of building want. Pornography teaches the opposite, it’s everything on your doorstep all at once. Abstaining from pornography and masturbation may help make your sex life healthy again. And rebuild desire while reestablishing sexual perspective.
5. Re-appreciate the Little Things
A cheeky text to your partner, a sexual promise for the evening, a knowing touch in public. Do you see any of these during one of PornHub’s top 50? No. Do they help boost a healthy sex life? Yes.
Pornography is all about the act, it focuses on intercourse, penetration and climax. It does not teach intimacy or interaction or develop the build-up, foreplay, anticipation and excitement present in mutually satisfying, real life sexual acts. Sex is both mental and physical, learning to tease your partner could be just the answer to remedy your sexual anxieties.
International Andrology is a world leading organisation of highly qualified physicians and surgeons who have played major roles in the development and improvement of modern surgical techniques in the field of men’s sexual and reproductive health. It offers the most advanced treatments for male sexual dysfunction, sub-fertility, aesthetic and functional urogenital surgery successfully treating problems like erectile dysfunction, Peyronie’s disease (extreme curvature of the penis) and premature ejaculation.